This is going to be a different post. In the past I never wrote about this. In my head I had to stay positive to help others. No one ever saw the other side of me or what I'm going through. But I decided to now really show my true self here and if you understand by the end of this thanks, and I feel you.
I think this all started when I was young. I was always afraid to do something bad or get bad grades, thinking my parents just wanted perfection. I mean who doesn't want their kids to be the best right? So as I kid I just worked my butt off but never really had a passion. Pretty much did what my parents wanted me to do. To them because they were immigrants of the Philippines who worked their butt off to come to Canada I thought, good they will be proud of me once I make them happy.
Now as a mom of two amazing kids, one who is will be 7 this September and one who is 3 I realized I've been dealing with anxiety all these years. I have never been diagnosed but that feeling of not being good enough. Or making sure everyone else around me needs to be okay before me. That feeling in your chest or always being anxious or always worried about everyone and everything.
It's been pretty bad lately and that's why I'm here. My amazing husband and my friend Sarah said start putting your thoughts on paper and let it be raw and let it be your true self. So here I am. Raw, and all me.
If anyone has ever felt this way or still feel this way, I know what you are going through. Let's fight this together and come out on top. It make take a long time but we will get out of this tunnel and hit that light at the end.
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